Mini Lessons To Learn/Learning/Learnt

See WHY, not See WHAT

Always see WHY the other person does the things he/she does and not see it as a WHAT he/she does.

eg. How IanPenguinMan (IPMan for short) was so OCD about the house.

WHY? He wanted us to have a lovely, clean house together(besides being slightly OCD) :)

WHAT? We would fight over the fact that he thought I was too messy, didn't care a bit about the house and that he had to clean up after me all the time despite working long hours. I thought that he was nitpicking about his obsession and couldn't see how tired and no mood I was, and was being inconsiderate.

Look for the best in each other, which is better than no one to look at at all

It's so easy to fall into that taking-each-other-for-granted, when life gets you down, and all you can think about are the days ahead, quarreling about expenses and house chores, trust me, all those are even LESS fun, when you have no one to quarrel with it about. And, you have to do those ALL on your OWN.

We should always look for the best in each other, and tell each other everyday, something about the other person, that we love. Start the day with a sleepy kiss, and then before either person leaves, tell them what they love about each other.

eg. IPMan used to tell me when he was up at those wee hours when I left, to "kill them with your cooking skills". I miss that.

Small Gestures May Slip By, But They Make Huge Differences To The Person Receiving Them

DUH. I know, I'm so late on this one. But hey, I just wanted to write about these little things that make so much difference.

eg. IPMan used to put frangipani flowers on my car windscreen before going to sleep. Me being sleepy me, would only realise once I'd hit the road and then, a huge smile would break out on my face in the traffic jam. He said, he'd do that after he died as well, just to let me know he's there. Well, I'm not going to get anymore of those. I wanted to do that to his car recently, but, there are no flowers so far, and this also brings me to the next point...

To Love, You Have To Let Go

To love a person truly, deeply and madly and forever, you have to let them go. Which is, when they want to go, when you are suffocating them even if they don't want to go, and when they really, truly want to GO.

I am *breath* at the most honest, TRYING *breath* to let *Breath* Ian *breath* go.

I know, my incessant calls and messages are just suffocating him, and I'm making a nuisance of myself. Who wants an ugly evil ex penetrating their daily life, when they're having so much fun on their own, tasting the sweet air of independence, worry-less air of the freedom of being single and extremely available and wanted on top of that?

I shall stop. Stop bugging him. This is so not me. I've never bugged someone before, especially not an ex. BUT, this time, for real, I have and I will cease.

And, just now, when I saw TinkyWinky, she'd lost so much weight.

Coincidental.... he, her and me - all noticeably lost weight. A family that's meant to be together, when torn apart, the sadness shows. It's all my fault. And so, I do as much as I can, to make their transition into a free, painless life without me, by letting them both go. I am changing, changed and still changing to become a better and stronger person.

But my heart? Still the same. Cheers *glass of milk* to life alone, ahead and hopefully, less painful than now.

As pink as SirErnieBernie, my only companion, is pink, I will always be here.

Because, deep down, he is my soulmate. I may not be his, but he is mine.

Goodbye dearest. *Flying kisses*


That evil, cruel, mean monster of an ex. *Rarrghhhauughhhharwghhhahh*