City Affair

I just finished watching New York I Love You, and at first sight, I thought it was going to be like Valentine's Day - the American version of Love Actually. But, several minutes into the show, I noticed how desolate everything seems to the many types of people, running through their lives in the largest, busiest city in the Land of Dreams. Everyone has that American Dream idealogy imprinted in their minds, even the Americans themselves, and it seems as if, everyone had their dreams broken and shattered drastically. Or even the typical story of unrequited love and unfulfilled desires of the alcoholic painter, who was so enamoured by the curves and expression on a Chinese girl's face, who asked her to sit for him, because he had not been able to capture her eyes, only to die before she finally went to look for him. Even the man and woman, who never hit it off at first, that they actually had a decent conversation and allowed their attraction to develop naturally, after having an alcohol-fueled night together, realised that they actually felt very deeply for each other and wondered if the other person felt the same, but due to the nature of their encounter, had so many doubts. The lone girl who would go around, videoing the scenes in the city, discovering so many emotions and gestures of the people who usually are just occupied in getting someplace, somewhere, now now, fast fast. The fatality and rarity of human connection in a place so full of people, all just touching, meeting, talking but rarely ever looking at each other for who they are.

I guess, it speaks to me. Since, I also want to make it to New York someday. No, not because of the whole American Dream, but just to see if I can actually make it there. That's the place that'll decide if you can achieve greatness or just fall back and go home, tail between your legs.

I don't know really, if it will ever come true. Am I jinxing it, just by writing it out here? Or, I should just get out of this train of thought, this endless subway ride and buy a ticket back home?

Hmmm.... apathy strikes again. With a tinge of hopelessness.

Let's see what tomorrow brings, because, today, I have nothing to look forward to.