The Boundaries of my love....

The ways I showed him I love him:


I would save up all my angpow money, so I could actually buy him things that I knew he would enjoy for a very long time 
- his PS2, because he badly wanted it, (on the verge of the launch of the PS3), which I cracked my head badly to look for, as I don't know much about PS2 prices
- the iPod 160GB because he loves music and has tons of it and always loves listening to music wherever he is, something I've always wished for, but never had the heart to spend the money on, for myself.
- the Harmon Kardon iPod dock sound system that looks like a modern boombox, which brings back memories of the 80s, and yet, is kick-ass better than Altec Lansing, which I was looking for like mad, when I took him out for his birthday massage in Circle massage and dinner at Bubba Gump's in the Curve. The massage was awesome, I must save up and go try one day, because they have these lavly rattan woven cocoons which are your rooms, and really nice looking stuff. I never even walked in to the place, except to bring him there. After blasting the eardrums of so many people, staff and customers alike, I finally decided on the Harmon Kardon, which I got later on.
- the Sennheiser head phones, when he wanted Skullcandy, whereas, I thought quality over style, and I looked high and low, for great sound which was somewhat similar to the Skullcandy ones. Personally, the Sennheiser noise blocking system looks way more comfortable than Skullcandy ones, and it comes with leather covered cushions and gold-plated cables. Wachaaww!


In the beginning, I didn't have much to spend, and so, I usually bought him bottles of Southern Comfort, because I knew, he didn't have the heart to buy those bottles but he loved it so much, that they would finish really fast, and so I did. Those bottles sit in the refrigerator now, holding water, with the date and occasions they were bought for.


I always knew when he was hungry, and would always try to get him good food. I know he likes creamy stuff, and looked for recipes containing his favourite ingredients, like bacon, cheese, mayonnaise, eggs and whatnot. I always tried to make him dishes that I knew he would love, and so came up with things that he said he loves (but I think now, it's different) like poached eggs (because he likes runny yolks) on luncheon meat (he loves pork) and white bread (he loves Gardenia).


He didn't use to drink coffee, but he eventually started, and we both love Coffee Bean, and so, he only drank Ultimate Vanilla Ice Blended (with coffee), and so I thought of making super ice cold milky coffee, and came up with, well, there's no name for it except for Ian's coffee. A non-alcoholic version of Bailey's, which he also loves.


He loves bacon and mayonnaise, and so I made tomatoes, stuffed with bacon, onion, parsley & mayonnaise, which is the only way he eats tomatoes anyways.


He so badly wanted an awesome old-school car, and when he got it, I loved seeing the look on his face when he drove it. When he got into an accident, I lent him some savings so he could repair the car, and drove him to work, the airport, at wee hours in the mornings, worked night job and had classes at the same time. I would get followed by weird people at 4am in the morning, go sleep outside a dark lonely college until it was time for classes, because that would be the only time I had. I would rush back from work just to send him to work, and then rush off to class again, being on my feet the whole day, and then come back, and fetch him, and then worry about what he'd want to eat for dinner. A hungry penguin is an angry grumpy penguin.


I knew he loves car shows, Taxi, Saw, Fast and Furious, so when I went back to Penang, I would go to the DVD shop and hunt for all those DVDs, just so we could sit back and watch those together.


All these things I did, he'd say that I was a spendthrift, and didn't know how to control my money. Yes, I do buy clothes now and then, and I enjoy getting something small every time, but it can never be as much as the money I actually am willing to spend for him. I would never dare, until now, to buy myself anything even though I badly want it, but I know, he LOVES these things, and so....


One of the last birthdays, I didn't know what to get him, and so I hunted around for the Stadium Arcadium by RHCP, and the next round, I got him the albums from Avenged Sevenfold. Those were really hard to find. 


If we didn't break up, I already had so many things lined up in my Bookmarks tabs, of all the things I wanted to get him. Original band tour Tshirts, candy skull Zippo, candy skull & pin-up paraphernelia, and oh well, actually, a Schechter guitar, if it must be said.


Oh yeah, I also designed the pink acoustic guitar for him. All the nights he was complaining and quarreling with me, I was actually spending drawing up the sketch, trying to incorporate things that he loves (skulls, stars, "Living Art", pink) into a guitar and the other days painting it and going all worried because it might not turn out perfect.


All the times I would get up in the middle of the night to make him food, as fast as possible, so that he could go to sleep.


Taking him to buy plants and buying the bamboo plant, even though I had to skimp a lot for the month, because it was too costly.


I don't look at money when I love someone, because I'd rather spend it on him, because it will make him happy.


And he says I don't appreciate the value of money, I sleep my life away, amongst other things. All those things he says to me hurts, because, I always had him at heart, when I did those things. Yes, I was super bitchy, but, it all came out, because we had so many petty issues we did not resolve, and it started to come out.


I also went on a board game craze, because I wanted to start staying home a little more, spend more time with him, but I don't think that made a point.


Seriously, if I got a windfall, the first things I think about are getting him the things he's always wanted. Like, a laptop, a sound system for TV and for the laptop (oh yeah, I spotted one, with Harmon Kardon sound system, perfect for him). Oh yeah, and the times I had backache, spending so many hours rearranging his entire music library, so it would look good on his new iPod go to waste. I "only spend time sleeping and drinking".


Sigh.


The boundaries of my love? None. In a heartbeat, I would be there for him. All he has to do is ask.